Category Archives: chaos at work

invisible formatting

190208 XKCD Invisible Formatting
190208 XKCD Invisible Formatting

when i was working at the print shop in issaquah, prior to my injury, i had a customer who always provided their own “artwork” for the print jobs they wanted. the problem was that this customer used Quark eXpress (which all the GOOD customers used) but he used the “faux” formatting from the toolbar — which is okay if you are printing from a local, computer-printer, but not if you’re sending it out to a print service — rather than using the “correct” formatting, by selecting the proper typeface from the menu.

what this meant, was that, inevitably, i would, either, have to reset the entire piece, or go through the artwork — sometimes character by character — to reset all of the faux formatting he had done.

i was really impressed that this guy was actually able to use the proper program for this, but it irritated THE HELL out of me that he couldn’t learn to do this one, TEDIOUS, TIME-CONSUMING, job correctly, so that i wouldn’t have to second-guess him all the time.

finally, i had enough.

i copied the entire piece, and pasted it just outside the page, on what they call the “pasteboard”. it’s usually not a place for permanent storage, but a place that it’s convenient to store blocks of type during formatting (so that you don’t have to type them more than once). if you do it correctly, it effectively doubles the size of the document, but there is no obvious flag which indicates the location of “the rest” of the document. if you “zoom out”, it’s obvious, but most people don’t “zoom out” larger than the page size, so it’s effectively hidden.

the first couple of times i did this, he didn’t notice, because he already had a relatively old, slow computer… but after a while of my doing this on the same document, he started noticing that this particular document took FOREVER to load, and it took EVEN LONGER to save, once he had made changes.

the last time i saw him, which was just before my injury, he was complaining about “his computer”. he said that he would double click the document, and then go away for an hour and do other stuff, and when he came back, sometimes the document would be loaded… 😈

this…

exactly why i am eternally grateful to whatever force put that brain-injury in my head so that i no longer am forced to put up with this kind of horseshit:

——

Client: I want a big image of the director prominently displayed on the main page of the website, front and center, about this size.

Client sends me an 800×600 image of the director in a stern, unsmiling pose, staring straight ahead.

Me: I don’t think that’s a good idea. That image is going to completely dominate the front page and gives a very unsettling “Big Brother” look.

Client: Big Brother? Who is that?

Me: Erm, it’s a reference from a very famous book about totalitarianism.

Client: I don’t know what that means, but I like the term “Big Brother”, it reinforces the “family” feel we are trying to portray. Please go ahead and put the image on the front page. Thanks.

     — Clients From Hell
——

The client wanted an advertising poster done by the 1st of May. I had informed them in advance that I would be gone on holiday in the 1st week of April. This is the phone call I received the evening before I was to depart with still a lot of preparation for the trip that needed to be done.

Client: Listen, you have to help me. There’s been a mistake. The poster has to be finished by Tuesday.

Me: What happened to the 1st of May?

Client: Yeah, you see, I sort of misread my boss’ intentions. Apparently it has to be printed and distributed on that date.

Me: I’m afraid I’ll be on a holiday until Friday, starting from tomorrow morning. I told you this in advance.

Client: Yeah, I know. But it’s not as if you have a stressful job right? I mean, it’s just making some illustrations and adding some text. You could easily do that by the pool or at some table by the bar. If my boss finds out about this mistake I will have a very stressful job.

     — Clients From Hell
——

Time for a guaranteed income?

Time for a Guaranteed Income? — this is the first step towards The RICH Economy, which i have been promoting for 20 years or so. nobody’s actually done it yet, but the fact that sweden is voting on it soon is definitely a step in the right direction…

although the author of this article doesn’t seem to think too highly of the concept… at least she isn’t dismissing the idea outright…

Continue reading Time for a guaranteed income?

On the Phenomenon of Bullshit Jobs

On the Phenomenon of Bullshit Jobs – i have an “excuse”: i am “disabled” and thus eligible for SSDI (which isn’t a walk in the park, even after i qualified for it, which was 5 years after my injury). but even if i weren’t “disabled”, i would probably NOT be “working” — in the traditional sense of the word — anyway, simply because so many of the jobs that i could obtain are “bullshit”…

now, here’s another point of view…

Continue reading On the Phenomenon of Bullshit Jobs

must… resist… urge… to… kill…

"I can’t watch the video you sent me cause it’s mp4. Can you send it in mp3?"
     — Clients From Hell

i’ve heard that before… from an employer… and it’s all i can do to not email that employer RIGHT NOW and figuratively strangle him until his eyes bug out, for uttering such inane drivel, despite the fact that i haven’t actually been employed by this particular IDIOT for at least 5 years… 😡