nam june paik died yesterday… 8(
Daily Archives: Monday, 20060130
338
Fnord is evaporated herbal tea without the herbs.
Fnord is that funny feeling you get when you reach for the
Snickers bar and come back holding a slurpee.
Fnord is the 43 1/3rd state, next to Wyoming.
Fnord is this really, really tall mountain.
Fnord is the reason boxes of condoms carry twelve instead of ten.
Fnord is the blue stripes in the road that never get painted.
Fnord is place where those socks vanish off to in the laundry.
Fnord is an arcade game like Pacman without the little dots.
Fnord is a little pufflike cloud you see at 5pm.
Fnord is the tool the dentist uses on unruly patients.
Fnord is the blank paper that cassette labels are printed on.
Fnord is where the buses hide at night.
Fnord is the empty pages at the end of the book.
Fnord is the screw that falls from the car for no reason.
Fnord is why Burger King uses paper instead of foam.
Fnord is the little green pebble in your shoe.
Fnord is the orange print in the yellow pages.
Fnord is a pickle without the bumps.
Fnord is why ducks eat trees.
Fnord is toast without bread.
Fnord is a venetian blind without the slats.
Fnord is the lint in the navel of the mites that eat the lint in the navel of the mites that eat the lint in Fnord’s navel.
Fnord is an apostrophe on drugs.
Fnord is the bucket where they keep the unused serifs for H*lvetica.
Fnord is the gunk that sticks to the inside of your car’s fenders.
Fnord is the source of all the zero bits in your computer.
Fnord is the echo of silence.
Fnord is the parsley on the plate of life.
Fnord is the sales tax on happiness.
Fnord is the preposition at the end of sixpence.
Fnord is the feeling in your brain when you hold your breath too long.
Fnord is the reason latent homosexuals stay latent.
Fnord is the donut hole.
Fnord is the whole donut.
Fnord is an annoying series of email messages.
Fnord is the color only blind people can see.
Fnord is the serial number on a box of cereal.
Fnord is the Universe with decreasing entropy.
Fnord is a naked woman with herpes simplex 428.
Fnord is the yin without yang.
Fnord is a pyrotumescent retrograde onyx obelisk.
Fnord is why lisp has so many parentheses.
Fnord is the the four-leaf clover with a missing leaf.
Fnord is double-jointed and has a cubic spline.
Fnord never sleeps.
Fnord is the “een” in baleen whale.
Fnord is neither a particle nor a wave.
Fnord is the space in between the pixels on your screen.
Fnord is the guy that writes the Infiniti ads.
Fnord is the nut in peanut butter and jelly.
Fnord is an antebellum flagellum fella.
Fnord is a sentient vacuum cleaner.
Fnord is the smallest number greater than zero.
Fnord lives in the empty space above a decimal point.
Fnord is the odd-colored scale on a dragon’s back.
Fnord is the redundant coin slot on arcade games.
Fnord was last seen in Omaha, Nebraska.
Fnord is the founding father of the phrase “founding father”.
Fnord is the last bit of sand you can’t get out of your shoe.
Fnord is Jesus’s speech advisor.
Fnord keeps a spare eyebrow in his pocket.
Fnord invented the green hubcap.
Fnord is why doctors ask you to cough.
Fnord is the “ooo” in varooom of race cars.
Fnord uses two bathtubs at once.
I cannot escape them
No matter how I try
They wait for me everywhere
I cannot pass them by.
Driving down the street
I see “Jesus Is Lord”
And then immediately after
I hear the word “FNORD!”
Innocuous sayings and parables
And on the evening news
I hear the word “FNORD!”
And suddenly I’m confused
I sit alone in my room
And I’m feeling rather bored
I turn on the tube and guess what
I hear the word “FNORD!”
“Don’t see the fnords and they won’t eat you”
That’s what I’ve heard the wisemen say
But I can’t get away from those beasties
There’s just no fucking way.
Dear Cecil:
Two related questions: As a cat owner, I’ve been a little concerned recently about rumors that cat poop can cause schizophrenic behavior in people who are overexposed to the waste. How much truth is in this–and if there is any truth to it, what amount can possibly count as overexposure? I’m also bothered by the supposed risk to pregnant women that changing the litter box can cause–not so much to them as to the fetus, through bacteria and whatnot. If that’s really true, then with a third of all Americans owning cats, why don’t we see higher rates of these dreadful birth defects? Certainly some of these women must get pregnant sometime, and I doubt they all know the dangers posed to them by cleaning up what Puss left behind. What gives?
–Onnie in Baltimore
Cecil replies:
Buckle up, friend. This one’s bizarre.
While you’re surely right that not everyone has gotten the word, the medical profession and hopefully most women of childbearing age know that if you’re pregnant you don’t want to get near cat feces. The problem is the protozoan Toxoplasma gondii, for which cats are the principal host. The microscopic parasites reproduce in the cat’s gut, the eggs are excreted, and by a process I’m not about to describe the critters wind up in your brain and muscles, where they create tiny cysts, leading to a condition known as toxoplasmosis. Unpromising as this sounds, the symptoms of toxoplasmosis are generally mild to nonexistent in adults, which is good, because roughly a third of all humans are infected, with the rate in some tropical countries approaching 100 percent.
For some, though, things are less benign. If a woman initially becomes infected while pregnant, there’s a fair chance the T. gondii will migrate across the placenta to her unborn child, with ghastly results ranging from cerebral palsy, seizures, and mental retardation to death. Women infected prior to pregnancy don’t run the same risk, which no doubt explains why we haven’t seen an epidemic of toxo-induced birth defects–the parasite’s ubiquitousness confers a sort of immunity. I’ve seen no research suggesting there’s a threshold exposure below which there’s no danger, and in my opinion it’d be foolish to assume there is one. Besides, you’ll never get a better excuse to make somebody else clean the litter box.
Here’s where things get strange. While the link between toxoplasmosis and birth defects has long been recognized, scientists now suspect that T. gondii may cause schizophrenia too. That in itself represents a major change in thinking–till recently the assumption, based on twin studies and the like, has been that schizophrenia is transmitted genetically. No way, scoffers say: schizophrenia is so profoundly disabling that sufferers tend not to reproduce. Germs are a likelier candidate. Studies typically have found T. gondii antibodies occurring in schizophrenics at twice the rate seen in control groups.
But get this. Forty-five percent of schizophrenics tested positive in one study for both T. gondii and D-lysergic acid diethylamide, better known as LSD. To quote a recent paper: “These results support the hypothesis that T. gondii may cause schizophrenia and may do so by producing or triggering the production of an hallucinogenic chemical” (“Genes, Germs, and Schizophrenia,” Ledgerwood et al, Perspectives in Biology and Medicine, 2003). Mindful that rodents are often an intermediate host for the parasite, the authors go on to say, “Production of such a compound may have been favored by natural selection because an infected, hallucinating rodent would be more easily captured by a cat.” In other words, schizophrenia in humans may be a side effect of T. gondii’s attempt to set cats up with a steady supply of tripping mice, the better to ensure its own reproductive success. Told you this was bizarre.
A word of caution: our authors’ impressive theoretical edifice is built on some pretty thin evidence. It’s simplistic to say T. gondii works by triggering the production of LSD–among other problems with the idea, acid mainly gives rise to visual hallucinations, whereas the delusions of schizophrenics are primarily auditory (e.g., hearing voices). No doubt genetics plays some role in schizophrenia, if only by establishing a predisposition to the condition. Still, even without the hallucinogen angle, this is a promising line of research. If germs are in fact a cause of schizophrenia, which afflicts more than two million Americans, there’s a better chance we’ll be able to come up with a method of prevention if not a cure.
–CECIL ADAMS
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BLUES are motivated by INTIMACY, seek opportunities to genuinely connect with others, and need to be appreciated. They do everything with quality and are devoted and loyal friends and employers/employees. Whatever or whomever they commit to are their sole (and soul) focus. They love to serve and will give freely of themselves in order to nurture others lives.
BLUES, however, do need to be understood. They have distinct preferences and occasionally the somewhat controlling (but always fair) personality of a confident leader. Their code of ethics is remarkably strong and they expect others to live honest, committed lives as well. They enjoy sharing meaningful moments in conversation as well as remembering special life events (i.e., birthdays and anniversaries). BLUES are dependable, thoughtful, nurturing, and can also be self-righteous, a bit worry-prone, and emotionally intense. They are like sainted pit-bulls who never let go of something once they are committed. When you deal with a BLUE, be sincere, make an effort to truly understand them, and truly appreciate them.
337
At some point, it all becomes unbelievable.
President George W. Bush has not made many moves more unethical than offering Noel L. Hillman, the Abramoff prosecutor, a federal judgeship. Hillman has apparently been talking with Bush’s representatives since last year, and on last Thursday, he publicly announced he was accepting the appointment.
Let me make this perfectly clear.
At the same time that Mr. Hillman was conducting a grand jury and submitting evidence aimed at Bush’s allies and perhaps Bush himself, he was meeting with Bush, who was, in effect, offering him a bribe.
Mr. Hillman, Bush is saying, leave the job, let me put someone else in your stead, someone I want. Forget, says Mr. Bush, that you have been in charge of the investigation for two years, that you have been involved on a day-to-day basis, and that your leaving seriously impedes the investigation.
All this had been kept quiet until Thursday, January 26, 2006. Neither the Bush administration nor Mr. Hillman thought it appropriate to let anyone know what was going on until the deal was done. Secrecy, the modus operandi of this administration, kept the information from the public.
President Richard Nixon was the last one who tried something like this, but he didn’t get away with it. In 1971, he invited a California federal trial judge, Matthew Byrne, then sitting on the criminal prosecution of Daniel Ellsberg for his release of the Pentagon Papers, to Nixon’s San Clemente home, to offer Byrne the job of heading the Federal Bureau of Investigation. Byrne accepted the invitation. A limousine sent by Nixon picked Byrne up after the court. The next morning, at 7am, John Ehrlichman sent a limousine to Byrne to get his answer.
Neither Nixon nor Byrne nor Ehrlichman released information about any of the meetings. But secrecy, the modus operandi of that administration, did not work.
That day, the story leaked. Leonard Weinglass, one of the attorneys for the defense, virtually cross-examined the judge in the courtroom. The judge confirmed the meetings and then turned down the job.
Byrne then denied a recusal motion, continuing with the case. Byrne, then totally aware of his impropriety, ultimately dismissed the case, in part, because of the storm created by his secret Nixon meetings.
Both Matthew Byrne and Noel Hillman have good reputations. Byrne recognized that he was offered a bribe and turned it down.
I do not personally know Mr. Hillman. Thus far, his public actions seem to warrant only applause. But Hillman’s boss is Attorney General Alberto Gonzales. Neither has said a word about the offer and its acceptance. The public is entitled to know more.
But Bush is getting away with it. There’s been very little press coverage. Alito, Hamas, Iraq, and Oprah Winfrey have buried the story.
The Democrats should insist on the appointment of a special prosecutor to fill Mr. Hillman’s position. Attorney General Gonzales should not be permitted to designate Hillman’s successor.
This, unlike the botched up Alito hearings, is a war we can win. We should not let Bush appoint his own person, someone like Harriet Miers, Samuel Alito, or the man Bush’s father said was the best person qualified for a Supreme Court seat, Clarence Thomas.
It is nearly impossible to have faith in any of America’s governing personnel or institutions. This administration’s total disregard for law and ethics continues to shock even though we thought we were by now unshockable.
but according to my democratically elected, democratic congressional representative, there is enough of a question about whether his actions are impeachable or not that “more investigations” are necessary before we jail this bastard…
big surprise…
Jan. 26 (Bloomberg) — A majority of Americans said the presidency of George W. Bush has been a failure and that they would be more likely to vote for congressional candidates who oppose him, according to a CNN/USA Today/Gallup poll.
Fifty-two percent of adults said Bush’s administration since 2001 has been a failure, down from 55 percent in October. Fifty- eight percent described his second term as a failure. At the same point in former President Bill Clinton’s presidency, 70 percent of those surveyed by Gallup said they considered it a success and 20 percent a failure.
In a poll conducted in January of 2002, after Bush was president for one year, 83 percent of those surveyed said his presidency was a success.
In the new poll, conducted Jan. 20-22, fifty-one percent of those surveyed said they would be more likely to vote for congressional candidates who do not support Bush’s policies.
The percentage of Americans who called Bush ‘honest and trustworthy’ fell 7 percentage points in the last year to 49 percent, the poll found.
The new poll also found that 62 percent of Americans said they are ‘dissatisfied’ with ‘the way things are going’ in the U.S., unchanged from a December survey. The percentage of ‘dissatisfied’ Americans reached its peak in October of 2005 when 68 percent of those surveyed agreed.
The survey interviewed 1,006 U.S. adults and has a margin of error of 4.5 percentage points. For the questions about whether Bush’s presidency is a success, about 500 U.S. adults were surveyed and the margin for error is plus or minus 5 percentage points.
if that’s the case then why isn’t there more action towards getting him out of office and into a jail uniform? 8/
by the way, in a typical republican move, they moved up the vote for alito’s confirmation from tomorrow to today but didn’t tell anyone in hopes that the democrats won’t get behind a filibuster. i heard about the possibility on friday, and sure enough, today it’s announced.
tomorrow is too late!
ACLU sues Homeland Security for arresting, spying on vegans who protested ham
The American Civil Liberties Union today filed a federal lawsuit in Atlanta on behalf of two vegan protesters who were subjected to imprisonment, arrest and harassment by Homeland Security officials.
The lawsuit stems from a Dec. 2003 incident, when vegans Caitlin Childs and Christopher Freeman were protesting on public property outside a Honey Baked Ham store in Georgia’s DeKalb County.
After the protest, the duo noticed they were being watched and photographed by a man in an unmarked car. They approached the car and wrote down the make, model, color and license plate number on a piece of paper. They then noticed the unmarked car was following them.
According to the ACLU suit, the car contained both a uniformed police officer and an undercover detective, later identified as Homeland Security Detective D.A. Gorman. The two pulled in behind Childs and Freeman and ordered them to exit their car.
Gorman then demanded that she turn over the piece of paper on which she had copied his license tag number. Childs refused to hand the paper over, and was handcuffed.
She was searched a male officer, despite her request to be searched only by a female officer, the ACLU says.
Both Childs and Freeman were arrested and charged with disorderly conduct. Police confiscated the piece of paper and Childs’ house keys. Both were released from custody, but neither the piece of paper nor the keys were returned. The county has not pursued a criminal case.
To view the surveillance photos taken by Homeland Security, go to http://www.aclu.org/spyfiles/honeyham/1.html.
More from the ACLU’s release:
“All across the country, the ACLU is uncovering information about Americans engaged in peaceful protest being spied on by Homeland Security, the FBI and local police,” said Debbie Seagraves, Executive Director of the ACLU of Georgia. “It is deeply disturbing that the government would use resources intended to protect national security to instead spy on innocent Americans who do nothing more than express their opinions on social and political issues.”
The ACLU argues that by stopping and detaining Childs and Freeman for no legal reason and then refusing to tell them why they had been pulled over, Detective Gorman and the DeKalb County Police Department deprived them of their right to be secure in their person and to be free from unreasonable search and seizure. The officials’ actions violated the First, Fourth and Fourteenth Amendments of the federal and state constitutions, charged the ACLU.
“People of this country need to realize that our basic human rights are being whittled away on a daily basis,” Freeman said. “I hope this case brings to light the fact that anyone can come under government security and pay the price.”
In addition to the lawsuit, the ACLU has filed Freedom of Information Act (FOIA) requests on behalf of Childs and Freeman to uncover any surveillance files kept on the activists by Homeland Security or other law enforcement agencies. ACLU affiliates in 15 other states have filed similar requests with the FBI on behalf of more than 100 groups and individuals, as part of a nationwide effort to expose unlawful domestic spying.
Last month, the ACLU of Michigan obtained an FBI report summarizing a meeting that was intended to keep local, state and federal law enforcement agencies apprised of planned protests and activities by various groups and individuals. Among the groups discussed at the meeting were an affirmative action advocacy group and a peace and justice group.
The ACLU launched its national “Spy Files” effort last year in response to widespread complaints from students and political activists who said they were questioned by FBI agents in the months leading up to the political conventions. The FOIA requests seek two kinds of information: 1) the actual FBI files of groups and individuals targeted for speaking out or practicing their faith; and, 2) information about how the practices and funding structure of joint task forces between the FBI and local police may be encouraging rampant and unwarranted spying.
no, it’s not the war on vegetarians, it’s the war on terrorists… this just goes right along with bush and his unwarranted domestic wiretaps, and it’s another reason why we need to revolt and oust these people from power… and people think it’s dangerous for me to wear a button that says "I Am A Terrorist!"… 8/